December 2005 Archives

If you're one of those last-minute gift wrappers, you might find this set of gift-wrapping instructions from eHow helpful (via Lifehacker). They describe the conventional wrapping method as well as ways to wrap oversized and unboxed gifts and some funky alternative wrapping ideas.

And while you're looking through the useful household tips, you might want to check out the glue advice at the This to That site. Choose two things that you want to attach to each other, and the site will tell you which glue to use.

I've always loved my wife's handwriting—and not just for sentimental reasons. It has a fun and sassy kind of look to it that is clearly distinguishable as hers. Ever since I learned about font creation software a few years ago, I've been determined to turn Sara's handwriting into a font of her own. Unfortunately, I never got around to doing it. Anyway, the software programs require more patience than I have and most are too expensive.

But a few days ago I discovered a really cool website (via somebody's blog, but I can't remember whose anymore) called Fontifier that automates most of the work and produces a custom font almost instantaneously.

You just print out a template and fill it out with upper-case and lower-case letters, plus a bunch of symbols. Then you scan it and save it as an image. After that, upload the file to the website, fill out the credit card info, and for 9 dollars, you have your font.

This is what Sara's looks like:

I had Sara fill out one of those templates, and I did the rest. Then, within minutes I presented her with her own font for a little early Christmas present. Not much of a surprise, but it was fun to do, and she seems to like it.

Update: For those of you who think Sara's handwriting looks cool and want to use the font for yourselves, I've made it available for download. Just right-click (control+click on a Mac) on the "download" link and choose "Save Target As..." in the menu that appears. Enjoy!

A recent check of the big list of 2005 lists at fimoculous.com revealed a number of new word lists popping up around the web. Here are a few highlights:

Merriam-Webster Dictionary

As you may recall, last year's winner was blog. In a telling redirection of attention, the most-looked-up word in 2005 is integrity. Others in the top 10 are contempt, filibuster, insipid, tsunami, pandemic, and levee.

For the complete list, visit Merriam-Webster Online.

Lake Superior State University

This year saw some fun entries into their annual "List of Banished Words." By "banished words," I think they mean words that they themselves or others would like to banish from the English language because of their recent misuse, abuse, or overuse. A few that made it on the list this year were:

• Blue States/Red States
• Flip Flop
• Pockets Of Resistance
• Enemy Combatant
• Wardrobe Malfunction
• Blog [say it ain't so!]
• Journey
• Sale Event

For the complete list, as well as reasons for banishing these words and phrases, visit the Lake Superior State University website.

The Global Language Monitor

This website just posted their Top Politically Correct Words for 2005—a list of words that people or organizations have substituted for harsher, less-sensitive words. My favorites:

• misguided criminals (for terrorists)
• thought shower (for brainstorm)
• deferred success (for failure)

See the whole list with explanatory notes and quotes at The Global Language Monitor.

Sometimes I get confused and dizzy like I'm going to fall off a precipice even though I'm sitting on the sofa in my living room when I think about the endless choices I have for all manner of consumer goods and all I want, all I really, really want, is for some movie star or television sitcom character to tell me what to buy. That's why I was thrilled when a friend of mine at work today showed me an article on the Wired News website that reported an 84 percent rise in product placements on TV this year. It's been terribly hard to know what I should think about shaving cream, for example, ever since I stupidly bought TiVo a couple years ago and started skipping the commercials. Now I don't have to worry anymore about which perfume to buy for my wife. Well, I never worried about it before, either, but that was because I had no idea that Wal-Mart had its own perfume line. I know, I know—how naïve. But thanks to All My Children we can all stay up to date on the latest trends in affordable, magnificent scents! Also, I no longer have to feel guilty about robbing those poor corporations of their advertising dollars. Instead, I can count on my TV programs portraying real situations with the real products that they want me to enjoy. No more Brand X coming between me and my willing suspension of disbelief! From now on, it's totally immersive consumer verisimilitude.

Unfortunately, this liberation from the shackles of indecision has not gone unchallenged. Some uppity script writers are waging a war on product placement, not unlike the war on Christmas, with a website called productinvasion.com. These people actually believe that they— not the ones who are footing the bill—should get to decide the plots of the TV shows that they're writing. Now that's downright un-American.

Read the Wired News article: TV Writers Must Sell, Sell, Sell

This little poetry feature of mine is long overdue, so here are two stanzas from a four-stanza poem by Jane Kenyon. That's right—two for the price of one:

For a brief biography of Jane Kenyon, along with about 10 of her poems, visit the Academy of American Poets website. The site also has the full text of Happiness.

It's time once again for the word of the year, this time brought to you by the New Oxford American Dictionary. As you may recall, last year's top word, according to Merriam-Webster, was blog. Now we have Podcast, a technology popularized by blogs. Oh, that rapidly encroaching blogosphere.

The NOA Dictionary's definition of podcast is "a digital recording of a radio broadcast or similar program, made available on the Internet for downloading to a personal audio player." But the definition seems a little weak to me, because a podcast has a very particular delivery mechanism which uses RSS to automatically download new audio content at regular intervals as it becomes available. Not that most people care. Anyway, Wikipedia has a much better explanation of the term.

Here are a few of the other top words this year:

• IED: improvised explosive device, such as a car bomb
• rootkit: software installed on a computer by someone other than the owner, intended to conceal other programs or processes, files or system data
• sudoku: a logic-based puzzle consisting of squares that form grids within a grid. Into each smaller grid, the numerals 1 through 9 are entered but not repeated, and they may not be repeated in any row or column of the larger grid
• lifehack: a more efficient or effective way of completing an everyday task

Read the full story in Yahoo! Financial News: 'Podcast' Is the Word of the Year.

Last night as I was scanning my inbox for new email, I came across a message from my dear friend "Mailer Pharramacy." Since I hadn't heard from her in a long time, I immediately opened it to see what she has been doing for the past few months. But when I read through the email, I was a little confused:

Hello,
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Our logs indicate that you perhaps have necessity in a supplement.

We beg your pardon and would like to propose you again a set of the most popular medicines online at reduced prices, fast delivery and toll-free customer support.

If you wish to order drugs you are in need or to run over the edition, please go to...

Then it dawned on me. This wasn't my friend Mailer Pharramacy at all. It was an impostor! I'm no dummy, and whoever sent me that email wasn't going to fool me.

As George W. Bush so aptly put it, "Fool me once, shame on—shame on you. Fool me—you can't get fooled again!"